“How do i stay positive??! I do so well then something pisses me off and i can’t control it...”
The problem is control. We aren’t here to be controlled by our egos or anyone else. We are here to live the full fluidity of the human experience and that includes all of the emotions you mentioned. You’ll have a hell of time if you’re tryna control your darkness. Best try to understand it. Ask yourself questions in your head as soon as you’re triggered or at least after “why did i get mad” and every time you get an answer and it involves the other person. Keep asking until you get an answer that’s YOU...because THAT PART YOU CAN FIX...i know it’s like “but they_______”
So? And why you angry about that? “Because I would never_______” ahhhh. There you have it. You’re angry at them for not being YOU and as much as i understand, that’s not fucking fair or fun for anyone. So, when we pissed it’s not really the people DO that make us angry, ppl are as free to live in their bodies as we are in ours, but ppl can trigger us because we have parts of ourselves that need attention.
For example: if you constantly feel betrayed or under loved because of someone’s actions...it is because without them knowing, you held them personally responsible for that part of your InnerG. Which takes it away from you every time. Instead observe when you are offering things in places you know reciprocity doesn’t exist and then keep asking why.
In the meantime tho, be angry, feel evil, feel hateful, feel dread, feel it all, the power is in understanding that their all your feelings and then deciding to only take direct Action behind the ones that are the exact opposite but existing at the same time, as those emotions. The Love emotions. There always there we just aren’t always looking.